Ups and downs

When I say that I mostly mean downs, but I am trying to stay positive here.
Today I took Zander to the dentist for some fillings. I already felt terrible about allowing my 3 year old to get cavities, but we smiled through it and went in September to get the fillings. The dentist gave him an oral sedative, which did nothing but make him run around like a crazy man all day, we cancelled the appointment and could not schedule and IV sedation until now. We went in today and found out that in addition to the fillings he needed he also needed his front 2 teeth capped because they were thin and the nerves were in danger of being exposed. I signed the paper and then I cried, alot. I feel like a huge failure as a mother here.
He came through just fine and was excited that he could feel immediately that the Dr. had made his teeth bigger and stronger. He has been "wiggly" all day due to the effects of anesthesia, so I have tried to keep him calm.

This after noon I went to see my urologist, who was supposed to get all the records of tests done by my previous urologist this summer and go from there, but somehow he decided if he was taking over my care he wanted to re-do all the tests. These tests are time consuming, and to be honest they hurt like heck. I cried again. I was then told that they could schedule the first test Thursday the 18th at 10:30. I told them I am starting a new job on the 10th and will be off by 3:30 every day, could they work around that..... "No, we only do these procedures on Thursdays between 10 and 11" I said Okay, can you put me on the cancel or no show list? "No, we don't have one, do you want the procedure done or not?" Of course I have to get it, but I am afraid I will loose my job. I cried even harder yet. I did hold it together until I got into the hall, but then I lost it. I sat down and just cried. A nice old man who had heard the whole thing came up to me and said that he would pray for me, and that things would work out. He talked to me until I was able to smile and the tears stopped.

The ups are that Adam and I are doing well, he is enjoying school. Aidan is happy and healthy, and Zander is the tornado that I love.
I would give anything for a friend here, just someone to sit and chat with, but this city does not do that I guess, at least not where I live.
I am just sad, tomorrow will be a better day I am sure, I will try to post then with some happy thoughts!