Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Looking on the bright side

Ok, Yesterday was a bad day, very bad. I often will make posts that are never meant to be posted, just saved for me and only me to see. I did this yesterday only I pushed the publish button instead of save. In the brief time that I figured out how to unpublish it and save it for my eyes the one person on this earth that I never meant to see it did. For that I am sorry. It is now filed safely away under the "for my eyes only" column, but unfortunately I have made someone very angry, and have to suffer the wrath of that now.



I am trying hard to look on the bright side of things today. I have a husband, and a husband that works hard for his family. He is currently going to very intense classes in preparation for his LSAT, after taking this very hard test we will find out where we move. I am very excited for my husband to pursue his lifelong dream of going to law school, and I am very excited to move and start our new life... wherever that may be. The stress of this, along with the stress of not having a home of our own has been hard on both of us. I am confident that we will pull through this and come out happier than we have ever been.



I have 5 children and children love unconditionally. They are all fabulous kids and I am blessed to have them in my life. They are what keeps me going when the going gets tough. It is almost impossible to not laugh when Dylan is around, Lyndsay has this fabulously calming energy about her, it is relaxing and fun to just sit with her.... oh and she loves to do my hair which I adore! Aiden Tanner will distract Zander if he is crying at my feet while I am trying to make dinner, and play happily with him for an hour, without ever being asked (Thanks for that A.T. you rock!) Aidan Wolfe has this energy that drives you right up the wall, but he has so much love in him. He is always there for me... I mean ALWAYS, like he never leaves my side!!! But when he sees a sad look on any one's face he is not too proud at the age of 9 to give lots of hugs and cuddles. Zander is my joy. There is nothing in the world Zander loves than cuddling... well maybe he loves his bottle more, I'm not sure... but he is a lover for sure. If he sees me or his dad laying on the couch, and tilt his head to the side and say "mom, can I snuggle with you please mom?" (Apparently the use of mom at the beginning and end will give him a better chance), and he will get up on us, lay on his tummy and put his arms in between us and snuggle down for 5 or 10 minutes then go about his day. It is the sweetest thing I have ever experienced!

I am lucky enough to have parents and in-laws that will allow us to stay with them in this time of transition that we are going through.

I am lucky to have the opportunity to go back to school to get a degree, and lucky enough to be getting straight A's so far (except for that darn English composition class, which may just be my first B in college!)

I am working on finding peace in my life, I am trying to get rid of the anger that I hold toward so many different people because it is toxic to me. I have to tackle it one thing at a time, but I am working on it, and I will get there!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

hmmm u got me wondering what was said in your private post! dont feel to stressed my life is sucking too

Leah said...

Hi Jen!
I am trying to get back into the blogging world. Life can be so crazy sometimes. (ALL THE TIME) I have the hardest time setting priorities on what to do and where to go! I am sorry to hear you are having a hard time. Transtions are the worst. They say that the three most stressful things in life are: changing a job, moving, and having a baby, and you guys are doing ALL three at the same time!!! You are an awesome person with a huge heart and willingness to love those around you. I miss having you around the corner-wanna move to the dirt and heat here in Maricopa!!?? You'll be okay, it might be hard for awhile but after the hard stuff it is always worth it in the end. I will add you to my prayers, keep me in yours!

Unknown said...

Jen, Happy to hear from you. I guess you made up for lost time! Mike leaves for Hawaii in about a month. He'll be gone for about a year. Wayne's still getting straight A's and I'm fighting a cough that won't go away. Hope everything goes well for Adam. Take care, Bill.